Sunday, June 6, 2010


Hey everyone!

We're back after a long hiatus (internet time in Switzerland is about 8 times more expensive than everywhere else) and we have some updates about our time in Prague, Berlin, and the Alps.

Becca and I caught our train from Vienna to Prague after once again sprinting to the train station. It actually wasn't our fault this time. Somehow we were given wrong directions by the lady at the train station.

We finally arrived through Prague after a ride through the beautiful Czech countryside (and a few really sketchy Czech towns) and quickly realized why Prague has become such a popular destination. It's absolutely gorgeous. Becca and I climbed to the top of an old fortress, the Vysherad, that overlooks the city. The views were incredible and we had the place to ourselves.

Oh yeah, Czech people are kinda dicks. Becca's luscious blond locks drew so much attention that a crazy man near the Vysherad asked to take a picture of it and a group of fat, ugly schoolchildren (ok, maybe not fat and ugly, but Becca and I like to think of them as that way) started pointing at her and squawking like birds. Really clever...fatties. We also wandered around the Stare Metska (old town) and admired the amazing architecture. Everything is incredibly ornate. We saw the Charles bridge and took some great pictures of the river and the city.

We ate some dinner and I drank some Staropramen, a delicious beer brewed in Prague. We also found a Ben & Jerry's so we broke our promise of not eating American food and loaded up on Mint Chocolate Cookie and Coffee ice cream.

We woke up the next day and ate breakfast with the London chapter of Hell's Angels. They were going back for third and fourth servings and yelling loudly in uninteligible British accents. Charming. After that, we went to Prague Castle, Pragues main attraction, and joined eight thousand Japanese tourists taking pictures of every brick along the way. It was fun and unique but I think we both enjoyed the Vysherad more.

Disaster struck soon afterward in the form of Joe's Garage (spelled phonetically in Czech, but our keyboard can't handle that right now).

We were both pretty hungry and looking for a place to set down our giant fifty pound backpacks before we took our train to Berlin. We saw a restaurant on the side of a touristry stretch of the old town that had available tables outside. Joe's Garage.

"Rick Steves wouldn't like this," Becca said.

"Fuck Rick Steves," I said. "I'm hungry and tired."

I soon came to regret that.

First off, my beer was sour. Not just "different" for my unrefined American palate but actually sour. It was a Staropramen, that same delicious beer I had drunk the night before so I know what it was supposed to taste like. I've had six day old warm bud light that tasted better.

Second, Becca's salad (supposedly corn, spinach, pine nuts, goat cheese, sun dried tomatoes, and assorted lettuces) turned out to be diced cucumbers and tomatoes. Without dressing.

Third, my chicken sandwich tasted like shit and so did the fries. Gordon Ramsey would have a fit.

Fourth, the Mauve hairs were out in full force. In case you haven't heard of a "mauve hair," they're the eastern european equivalent of American "blue hairs." For some reason, women over the age of 60 in Vienna and Prague feel the need to dye their hair bright purplish-red. The ladies next to us were ALL mauve hairs and each one was chain smoking doo doo cigarettes.

Fifth, it took about forty five minutes to pay because their credit card machine wasn't working and we hadn't sufficiently stocked up on Czech crowns to pay for it with cash.

All in all, a huge disaster.

Sorry to spend so much time complaining about this restaurant. It was just that terrible. Everything else about Prague was amazing, though.

Still, Joe's Garage was so bad that we took an earlier train to Berlin than we had anticipated simply to get as far away from that meal as possible. I'm not kidding. Becca and I had planned on exploring a neighborhood near Prague Castle but were so turned off that we spent our last three hundred Czech crowns on beer and chocolate and got the hell out of there.

Once again, internet time is running out but there will definitely be an update soon. Were not in Switzerland anymore...

Jay and Becca

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